Showing posts with label DNC. Show all posts
Showing posts with label DNC. Show all posts

Biden Gets Lost During a Friendly Game of Peek-A-Boo at the Airport

Unfortunately, Biden's attempt to entertain the child failed
as the presidential candidate suddenly vanished into thin air
right before the child's eyes. 

-- Washington, DC

By Robert W. Armijo

Joe Biden had been engaged in a game of Peek-A-Boo with a small child while waiting to disembark from his flight in South Carolina today when the 2020 presidential candidate suddenly became confused, disoriented and disappeared from the sight of his staff.  

“Peek-A-Boo,” said Biden to the small child as he held up his two hands to his face. “I see you -- Hey, where [BLEEP] did everybody go?” 

"It was weird," said the father of the small child Biden had been playing the game of Peek-A-Boo. "One second he was there and the next he was gone."  

Biden was later found by airport security sitting on an unclaimed baggage carousel. Going round and round.  

Reportedly, airport security had to tell Mr. Biden to stop putting his hands up to his face, as each time that he would, he would wonder off back to the unclaimed baggage carousel. 

Finally, after several attempts, Biden was eventually reunited with his staff.

Photo(s) courtesy of

Copyright (C) 2020 by Robert W. Armijo. All rights reserved.

The Russians Are Coming! The Russians Are Coming! The Russians Are Coming!

"See? I Told You So."
Sarah Plain maybe the first spokesperson ever to 

Cold Warmonger for both the GOP and the DNC
By Robert W.  Armijo

“By golly wow,” said Sarah Plain, as she appeared via a conference call before a Democratic committee to investigate the alleged Russian interference with the presidential election of 2016 and in the wake of President Trump’s one-on-one Helsinki meeting with Russian President Putin.

“I can still see Russia from my house,” said Sarah Palin, while she peered through a telescope, across the Bering Straits over and out to Russia.  

“Yes. We know, Sarah,” said a Congressman. “But what are the Russians doing right now?”

The former Republican vice president candidate once mocked by SNL’s Tina Fey’s portrayal of her as a conservative caricature has now ironically become the point man for the Democratic party in their effort to single-handedly revive the Cold War.

Among growing criticism that the Democratic National Committee (DNC) is putting partisan politics above the nation’s best interests, a spokesman for the Grand Old Party (GOP) recently stated.

“I just hope we’re not too late,” said a spokesman for the GOP. “Midterm elections are just around the corner."

“What do you see, Sarah?” repeated the Congressman. “What are the Russians doing?”

“Oh, yeah,” said Sarah Palin. “They are definitely packing their bags.”

“You hear that!” proclaimed the Congressman. “Sarah Plain says, ‘The Russians are coming! The Russians are coming! The Russians are coming!”

“Yeah, well, no,” said Sarah Palin. “I didn’t exactly say that. But yeah, sure. Okay. Why not?”

Copyright © 2018 by Robert W. Armijo

Presidential Election 2012 Riddle #2

Q: Who rules like a Liberal but runs like a Conservative?

A: Mitt Romney!

Copyright © 2008-2012 by Robert W. Armijo. All rights reserved.

Presidential Election 2012 Riddle #1

Q: Who runs like a Liberal but rules like a Conservative?

A: Barack Obama!

Copyright © 2008-2012 by Robert W. Armijo. All rights reserved.

Blind Chinese Dissident Escapes House Arrest Assisted Only by His White Red-Striped Walking Cane!

Beijing, China –

Operating under the premise that children, the elderly and the handicapped are an invisible segment of our population in today’s modern society, a blind Chinese dissident escaped house arrest yesterday by recording and then looping the tapping sound he makes while walking with his white red-striped cane.

After making a few passes through his house, the visually impaired dissident then turned on the recording of the tapping noise, playing it for his unsuspecting captors.

As the bodyguards went about their daily routine of reading the newspaper, eating lunch and even engaging in light housekeeping, the blind man walked right out the front door to freedom.

“We’re so accustomed to ignoring the physically challenged,” said a clinical psychologist. “And those other two groups…um, that’s funny. Their names momentarily escape me. Any ways, they might as well be invisible, too.”

Apparently the dissident used his second-class social status of invisibility to his advantage, as he successfully escaped house arrest. Made his way down the driveway, walking right pass the armed guards stationed at their posts at the front gate of his home.

Then, once outside the compound, the blind man safely negotiated a pathway through downtown Beijing during the height of rush hour traffic. Which presented a greater danger to his life then his entire years under the watchful eye of the Chinese government.

Traffic cameras showed several close calls and near misses. However, the dissident persisted and emerged unscathed.

Finally reaching the sanctuary of the American embassy, the blind dissident tapped his way right passed the U.S. Marines guarding the embassy.

“We didn’t even know he was here,” said a spokesman for the U.S. envoy.

Not until the Chinese government informed the U.S. embassy of their missing dissident.

A quick search of the embassy grounds by American personnel initially turned up nothing, however.

“Until we checked our security cameras,” said the U.S. envoy spokesman. “And sure enough, there he was in the lobby. Just sitting there. Tapping away with his cane.”

Later, forensic analysis of the tapping determined the dissident was sending out a desperate plea in Morse Code: “WTF is wrong with you people? I want to defect. Can’t you see that? Are you blind or something? Holy [BLEEP] don’t tell me you’re hearing impaired too?”

Moments before embassy security cameras captured the blind man walking back-and-forth in front of the receptionist’s desk, asking to speak with a high ranking official. But he was completely ignored.

“She looked up from her magazine for a second,” explained the U.S. envoy spokesman. “But she didn’t see anything -- Just some blind guy mumbling to himself as he paced the floor.”

By that time, the dissident had tired. So he found a seat and sat down, waiting for the authorities to notice him by tapping out a message with his white red-striped cane.

Although the fate of the dissident is uncertain at this time, as to whether he will be returned to the Chinese government or remain in the protective custody of the U.S., who can say.

It is brinkmanship on the brink as to who will blink first: The Chinese or the Americans.

One thing is certain, however: Like the political stance he has taken, the blind dissident is no longer invisible.

“On the other hand, we’re in a presidential election year,” said an Obama White House official, asking not to be identified. “So either way, we’re screwed.”

No matter what course of action the Obama administration takes, the unidentified Obama official says he can read tomorrow’s GOP newspaper headlines today:

’Obama’s Failed Foreign Policy Fails to Protect Free Speech in China!’” said the Obama White House official. “Or worse yet, ‘Obama’s Foreign Policy in China Literally Lead by Blind Man!

Copyright © 2008-2012 by Robert W. Armijo. All rights reserved.

Photo Courtesy:

Florida Straw Poll Explained: Herman Cain Mistaken for John McCain

South Beach, Florida –

“Who?” asked Mrs. Beatrice Bernstine, 83, into her phone to a straw poll conducted by the Republican Party in Florida. “Did you say, McCain?”

“No, ma’am,” answered Todd Hogan, a pollster for the GOP. “I said, ‘Cain.”

“Who?” again repeated, Mrs. Bernstine.

“Cain,” replied Mr. Hogan before losing his cool. “Cain!!! Cain!!! Cain!!!”

A long pause came from the other end of Mr. Hogan’s telephone line.

Mr. Hogan's guilt for yelling at an old lady, as well as concern for her well being, quickly replaced his frustration and anger.

“Maybe I scared the old gal to death,” the pollster thought to himself.

Finally, the silence was broken.

“McCain?” again repeated, Mrs. Bernstine.

“Whatever,” said Mr. Hogan as he slammed down the phone.

“Yes,” replied Mrs. Bernstine to a dial tone. “I’d vote for McCain.”

Copyright © 2008-2011 by Robert W. Armijo. All rights reserved.