Showing posts with label Herman Cain. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Herman Cain. Show all posts

Herman Cain’s Subliminal Message Hidden in His Political YouTube Ad: I’m Not Just Blowing Smoke Up Your [BLEEP], Baby!

Herman Cain’s Manager
"Just Blowing Smoke"?
Madison Avenue, New York –

Everyone is abuzz about Herman Cain’s controversial political campaign ad, which features his campaign manager (left) blowing cigarette smoke into the camera.

Many have formed theories as to what it could mean, but only one man, a former Madison Avenue ad executive, claims to know what it is all about.

“What is Mr. Cain saying to the American voter?” said Albert Brayne, a retired ad executive who specialized in subliminal advertising. “That’s easy. He’s saying: ‘I’m not just blowing smoke up your [BLEEP], baby!”

According to Brayne, Cain’s controversial political campaign is peppered with hidden images of the female buttocks.

“Only they flash on the screen too fast for the naked eye to see,” said Brayne, who has analyzed the Cain YouTube ad frame by frame, using specialized equipment to confirm his findings. “But they’re there, as plain as the nose on your face. You just can’t see them.”

Brayne says that although the suggestive images are invisible, the mind’s eye can still see them. Leaving a formidable and lasting impression on the mind of the average person.

“The untrained eye of the general public is most susceptible to subliminal advertising,” said Brayne. “Making them most likely to buy into any message without question.”

Only people, like Brayne, with a trained eye are able to detect subliminal images or messages without the use of optical enhancement equipment, seeing them for what they really are.

“Of course, there are exceptions to every rule,” said Brayne. “For example, sex maniacs. They are able to see sexual subliminal images without the use of any special equipment.”

Copyright © 2008-2011 by Robert W. Armijo. All rights reserved.

Florida Straw Poll Explained: Herman Cain Mistaken for John McCain

South Beach, Florida –

“Who?” asked Mrs. Beatrice Bernstine, 83, into her phone to a straw poll conducted by the Republican Party in Florida. “Did you say, McCain?”

“No, ma’am,” answered Todd Hogan, a pollster for the GOP. “I said, ‘Cain.”

“Who?” again repeated, Mrs. Bernstine.

“Cain,” replied Mr. Hogan before losing his cool. “Cain!!! Cain!!! Cain!!!”

A long pause came from the other end of Mr. Hogan’s telephone line.

Mr. Hogan's guilt for yelling at an old lady, as well as concern for her well being, quickly replaced his frustration and anger.

“Maybe I scared the old gal to death,” the pollster thought to himself.

Finally, the silence was broken.

“McCain?” again repeated, Mrs. Bernstine.

“Whatever,” said Mr. Hogan as he slammed down the phone.

“Yes,” replied Mrs. Bernstine to a dial tone. “I’d vote for McCain.”

Copyright © 2008-2011 by Robert W. Armijo. All rights reserved.