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♫No More Mr. Nice Guy!
No More Mr. Clean!♫ |
Washington, D.C. --
On the eve of the second presidential debate, Mitt Romney reportedly received a personal message from President Barack Obama in the form of a singing telegram, delivered to the hotel where his opponent was rehearsing for the upcoming debate.
“At first, we all thought it was a practical joke,” said a hotel waiter, who witnessed the event while filling up pitchers of ice water.
Mitt Romney was standing behind a podium as a man dressed as a professional boxer, wearing a silken red robe, gloves, shorts and laced up leather ankle boots underneath, walked into the conference room, making everybody laugh.
“Including the man of the hour, Mitt, himself,” said the debate coach. “In fact, I think he laughed the hardiest."
That was until the boxer threw off his robe and began to sing.
Pulling out a harmonica from one of his gloves, the boxer blew a few notes to tune himself up. Nervously clearing his throat, he started to sing.
♫No More Mr. Nice Guy! No More Mr. Clean!♫
Mitt Romney was so taken aback by the message that he immediately began to hyperventilate.
Seeing Romney’s reaction to the singing telegram, the Secret Service jumped on the boxer, wrestling him to the ground.
“But that didn’t stop him from singing,” said the waiter.
As the Secret Service picked up the singing boxer, dragging him out of the room, his head would pop up from the dark suits carrying him out and he would belt out a few more melodious lines.
♫No More Mr. Nice Guy! No More Mr. Clean!♫
Mitt Romney had his head between his knees.
“Fortunately, someone brought their lunch in a brown paper bag,” said the waiter.
One of Romney’s campaign managers had to presence of mind to grab it, emptying out its contents of a tuna sandwich, apple and box of Juicy-Juice.
“He placed it over Mitt’s mouth, slowing his breathing,” said the waiter.
That was until the boxer broke free of the Secret Service agents and entered the conference room again.
“This time the boxer jumped up onto a table and sang,” said the waiter.
♫No More Mr. Nice Guy! No More Mr. Clean!♫
“Oh God,” allegedly said Mitt Romney, as he continued to breathe into the brown paper bag. “I’ll be glad when this is all over.”
Copyright © 2008-2012 by Robert W. Armijo. All rights reserved.
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