"Yes, I'd like to Order Another Case of Red Bull." |
Washington, D.C. –
Reportedly, President Obama has been preparing for the second round of the presidential debate with Mitt Romney by drinking cases of Red Bull.
The distinct blue and silver delivery truck has even been sighted at the White House, backed up to the servant’s entrance of the kitchen.
“They’ve been making deliveries here ever since the president lost the first debate,” confirmed a member of the White House kitchen staff.
Political pundits speculate that the president is responding to the criticism of his own campaign team that he appeared tired, listless and unfocused during the last debate.
“He can’t afford to look like that again without placing his candidacy in serious jeopardy,” said a political pundit.
Judging by the number of empty Red Bull cans dumped in the White House recycling bin, however, the president may be overdoing it.
“If he drinks that much Red Bull on the night of the debate,” said an ardent energy drink drinker. “He’ll appear too edgy to look presidential.”
Signs to look for include body twitches, facial ticks, sweating profusely, rapid heart rate and talking too fast.
Meanwhile, over at the Romney camp, it is rumored that they are preparing for Tuesday night’s debate by doing pre-celebratory victory body shots of tequila.
Copyright © 2008-2012 by Robert W. Armijo. All rights reserved.