Tiger Woods’ Scandal Spreads to Breakfast Cereal For Kids' Icon of Similar Sounding Name


Los Angeles, California --

It seems fallout from the Tiger Woods affair(s) is/are having a negative impact on breakfast cereal icon ‘Tony The Tiger’ as the industry standard has filed to legally change his name in Superior Court, Los Angeles today.

According to the breakfast cereal manufacturer the change was not necessary but taken at of an “abundance of causation”.

However, industry insiders’ say that sales of the once popular breakfast cereal for kids has suffered a sharp decline in sales recently, due it is believed to the Tiger Woods infidelity scandal that broke late last month.

“I just won’t buy it for my kids anymore,” said Virginia Kruger, 47, single mother of two small children. “It might give them…you know, ideas.”

As the visibly emotional ‘Tony The Tiger’ stood in the nearly empty courtroom blowing his blue nose with his red bandana, which he customarily wears around his neck, the judge finalized the proceedings. Legally changing his name with one fell swoop his gavel.

“Well, your name is now legally ‘Anthony (Not Affiliated with the former PGA golfer known as Tiger Woods) The Tiger,” said the judge. “How does that make you feel?”

“GRRREAT!” replied ‘Tony’ -- I mean ‘Anthony’ -- as he through his finger up into the air, letting out his trademark cry. Which bellowed throughout the courtroom, down the hallway, outside down to the street and up to the steps of City Hall. “Just GRRREAT! Now little kids won’t confuse me with that adulterating [BLEEP] any more.”


“Don’t worry kids,” said a spokesman for the cereal company attempting to reassure children. “Anthony (Not Affiliated with the former PGA golfer known as Tiger Woods) The Tiger’ is a mouthful say, but you’ll get use to it. It gets easier the more times you say it.”


Copyright Ó 2008-9 by Robert W. Armijo