Showing posts with label The Big O. Show all posts
Showing posts with label The Big O. Show all posts

Fans React to Oprah Finale: "Where’s My [BLEEP] Damn Car?!"

Chicago, Illinois --

In the parking lot waving a piece of paper in her hand, Charlene Jackson, 25, stood on the hood of her car, a compact clunker model from the late 1980s. As other Oprah fans exiting the finale shuffled solemnly by, she encouraged them to join her. To sign her petition in hopes of forming a class action lawsuit to sue "The Big O" for not having a single makeover, dream vacation giveaway or especially a new car for her loyal fans that attended her final show.

"Sure we all love Oprah. And we’re all real sorry to see her go," said Charlene Jackson to growing crowd that all nodded their heads in agreement with her. "Now I have just one question to ask Oprah that she never got around to answering and that is: Where’s my [BLEEP] damn car?!"

The crowd roared with applause.

"Well, since Oprah never answered my question. I guess will," continued Charlene Jackson "I’ll tell you where it is…"

Charlene Jackson then jumped down from the hood of her car.

"It’s right here!" said Charlene Jackson banging the hood of her car, putting yet another dent in it.

Convincing the crowd that she along with the rest of them deserved a new car, Charlene Jackson got dozens of signatures before she was detained by security and her car towed away by police for expired vehicle registration.

Later, Charlene Jackson was spotted waving another piece of paper. Only this time it was a dollar bill she was waving in the air and she was not standing on the hood of her car. But a bus bench, awaiting the arrival of public transportation.

"Where’s my [BLEEP] damn bus?!" Charlene Jackson yelled out to passing cars. "Where’s my [BLEEP] damn bus?!"

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