Holy “Carapture”! Where Did “Carmageddon” Go?

Los Angeles, California –

Police were flooded with 911 calls from angry and concerned citizens reporting their cars as either lost or stolen, as Angelinos awakened early this morning to find the 405 Freeway reopened ahead of schedule.

Some religious leaders have speculated that the cars were taken up to Heaven in a form of Rapture, only for automobiles.

“It could be a case of mistaken identity,” said Rev. Doug Greene. “After all we spend so much time driving around in our cars, God could’ve taken them up instead of us.”

Other theologians believe God is being ironic.

“God is punishing us for our California car culture turned automobile idol worship,” said Roger Hammerhand, Professor of Philosophy at the Divinity School of Our Holy Martyr.

Professor Hammerhand asks all people regardless of their faith to pray.

“Pray he’ll show us mercy,” said Professor Hammerhand. “As he left behind only public transpiration for us to use, and that's a living Hell."

Copyright © 2008-2011 by Robert W. Armijo. All rights reserved.

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