10) Worn that spiral cone shaped bullet bra. She’s 53 now and really needs the support.9) Sung all her new hits, using her old phony baloney British accent.
8) Ripped up a photo of Britney Spears, while kissing Sinead O’Connor – Sinead who?
7) Sat down on a giant comfy couch surrounded by children, put on a pair of jewel studded cat framed granny eyeglass and read aloud a chapter from her book Sex. What? That’s right. It’s a picture book.
6) Adopt another kid from Ethiopia. No wait. That’s Angelina Jolie. Madonna got her kid from Kenya.
5) “Acted” out a scene from Evita with Antonio Banderas dressed up as Puss in Boots.
4) Had gay men dancing on stage. Correction: Had more gay men dancing on stage.
3) Gotten those Star Wars barking dogs to sing her songs instead of her.
2) Had a wardrobe malfunction, while singing Vogue.
1) Sung the ‘♪Bird is the Word♪’ while MIA flipped the Bird to a nationally broadcasted audience.
Copyright © 2008-2012 by Robert W. Armijo. All rights reserved.
