Showing posts with label Occupy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Occupy. Show all posts

Another “Occupy Wall Street” Joke

A conservative mother sent off her adult liberal son, a recent college graduate, to join the Occupy Wall Street movement with her blessing. Somewhat surprised, the son couldn’t resist asking his mother why she changed her mind. The mother abruptly replied, “Because, you’ve been living in the basement for over a year now. Time to go occupy someplace else.”


Copyright © 2008-2011 by Robert W. Armijo. All rights reserved.

Occupy Wall Street Calling: Send ‘Snuggies’ to Defy Ban on Sleeping Bags and Tents at Zuccotti Park

New York, New York –

Ironically described as the freedom blanket, the Snuggy now has a chance to live up to its commercial characterization. As Occupy Wall Street protestors are calling for hundreds of the unisex body-length sleeved coverings to be sent to them in order to be in compliance with authority’s latest attempt to squish the so-called “Anti-Wall Street” movement by prohibiting sleeping bags and tents in Zuccotti Park.

“With the Snuggies, we’ll be in compliance with the current ban on sleeping bags and tents,” said an occupier wearing a red, white and blue Snuggy, while handing out Snuggies to others. “And more importantly, we won’t freeze to death in the process.”

However, protestors are under no illusion that making the request for Snuggies will halt police and city officials from harassing them.

“It’s a stopgap measure,” said another occupier. “Designed to cover the occupiers, while exposing the hypocrisy of the police and city officials. Forcing them to come up with even more ridiculous excuses in an attempt to arrest this experiment called democracy.”

Copyright © 2008-2011 by Robert W. Armijo. All rights reserved.

Zuccotti Park’s Homeless Evicted by ‘Occupy Wall Street’

New York, New York –

A group of homeless people from Zuccotti Park (ground zero of the ‘Occupy Wall Street’ movement) showed up at a New York City police precinct today, demanding justice.

“They said they wanted us to arrest the protestors in Zuccotti Park for illegally evicting them from their home,” said police.

“I miss my bench!” read one of the signs held up by the homeless.

“Who’s feeding the pigeons?” read another.

“Who’s watering the gardenias?” read still another.

Turned away by police, the homeless decided to take matters into their own hands, holding a general assembly of their own. After a few minutes, they came to a consensus.

Standing on the sidewalk opposite Zuccotti Park, the homeless marched in a demonstration of their very own. Holding up signs which read: “Occupy, Occupy Wall Street Now!”

Copyright © 2008-2011 by Robert W. Armijo. All rights reserved.

‘Occupy Wall Street’ Infiltrated By Agent Provocateur ‘V’; Short-Circuits the ‘People’s Mic’

New York, New York –

Prohibited by police from using an electronic public address system, ‘Occupy Wall Street’ has devised a clever way to spread the word among the protestors. It is called: the “People’s Microphone”, or the “People’s Mic” for short.

“We repeat aloud what the speaker is saying to the general assembly,” explained a protestor.

And it was during a general assembly held daily, using the “People’s Mic” that the group was awakened to the realization that an agent provocateur was amongst them.

“We were in the middle of reading the previous day’s minutes when we caught ourselves voting to disband,” said a member of the general assembly, who found he was standing next to the agent provocateur, but did not know it. “He waited for the speaker to pause before speaking out.”

“He looked legitimate to me,” said another member of the general assembly, describing the physical appearance of the agent provocateur. “He was wearing a Guy Fawkes mask, black boots, gloves, cape and hat. Just like ‘V’ in that movie, V for Vendetta.”

Slowly, agent provocateur V rose up amongst the crowd, ready to spread his chaos.

“All those that are in favor of calling it quits, please signal now by waving your fingers in the air,” said the agent provocateur V, which was immediately echoed by the People’s Mic. Believing it was the general assembly’s speaker speaking.

The People’s Mic Repeated in Chorus:

“All those that are in favor of calling it quits, please signal now by waving your fingers in the air.”

Members of the general assembly just looked at each other bewildered by the announcement.

“What, wait?” said the general assembly speaker. “I didn’t say that.”

The People’s Mic Repeated in Chorus:

“What, wait? I didn’t say that.”

As everybody looked around trying to see who misspoke, the agent provocateur V ducked down temporally disappearing in the crowd.

“Apparently somebody misspoke,” said the general assembly speaker. “So please disregard that call for a vote to disband, okay?”

The People’s Mic Repeated in Chorus:

“Apparently somebody misspoke. So please disregard that call for a vote to disband, okay?”

Once again, the general assembly attempted to read aloud the minutes from the pervious day when the agent provocateur V struck again.

“Say,” said agent provocateur V. “Why don’t we all pull our pants down and take a dump on a cop car?”

The People’s Mic Repeated in Chorus:

“Say, why don’t we all pull our pants down and take a dump on a cop car?”

“Hey,” said the general assembly speaker. “Stop that.”

The People’s Mic Repeated in Chorus:

“Hey, stop that.”

Again, agent provocateur V disappeared into the crowd.

As the general assembly was readying to resume business again, suddenly, someone in the crowd spotted the black cloaked agent provocateur V far off in the distance.

“Look!” said a protestor, calling everyone’s attention to the direction his finger was pointing. “He’s over there. Atop that cop car taking a dump!”

The People’s Mic Repeated in Chorus:

“Look! He’s over there. Atop that cop car taking a dump!”


Copyright © 2008-2011 by Robert W. Armijo. All rights reserved.

Photo Courtesy of:
http://www.wpclipart.com/clothes/hats/adventure_hat/adventure_hat_black.png.html